*Which is to say there isn't a hoax that frightens me. The double negative is negated by the use of ain't which isn't a real word but implies that I am hip to the street lingo. Being hip to the street lingo gives me street cred for being able to provide commentary on urban legends and hoaxes.
|The Blair Witch Project
Clearly, there is a hoax here. I have to believe that the three film students who wondered off in the woods of Burkettsville were perpetrating a horrific hoax on the American public, and after the international release of the movie The Blair Witch Project, the world at large. The evidence is overwhelming that these three individuals were not killed in the woods. For my first piece of evidence, I present the movie Boys and Girls. Heather Donahue, the leader of the misguided trio, played a girl named Megan in the movie. Granted, after watching the remastered versions of Star Wars and The Crow I know movie studios can recreate an actor using computers. If Heather Donahue was digitally inserted into the movie, why? It just doesn't make any sense.
I contend that the three film students used thier faked deaths in the woods of Burkettsville to first flee their student loans and then parlay the limited publicity from the movie into careers in the entertainment industry. Their one flaw was crossing paths with the Hoax Buster! Gotcha!
McDonald's Serves Kangaroo Meat
Here at Hoax Buster Central, we not only bust hoaxes but verify truths. In this instance, evidence is mounting that McDonald's does serve kangaroo meat in their hamburgers. The evidence comes from Hoax Buster Junior Associate Marty "Sneezy" Johnson who says he ate kangaroo once when he was in Australia body surfing the Great Barrier Reef. According to Marty, "McDonald hamburger patties taste exactly like ground kangaroo." All I can say is G'Day, mate. Maybe McDonald's will do a tie in with Survivor II.
Sometimes this job is really difficult because I come across evidence that disproves one of my own beloved theories. For a long time now, the geologists of the world have been foisting the belief that the center of the Earth is filled with molten or melted rock. Floating on the surface of this very hot liquid rock are plates which crash into each other forming mountains or slip past each other causing fault lines where earthquakes come from. This is a wonderful little theory and seems to fit nicely in our modern view of science. But the flaws are too many for it to remain as the prevalent theory. Consider, if the center of the planet is filled with super hot molten rock, why doesn't the land floating on it also melt? When I put an ice cube in boiling water, it doesn't remain for very long.
More importantly is the opposing theory of Plate Tectonics which better explains geological phenomenon and some biological phenomenon also: Hollow Earth. The Earth is hollow and this is where the dinosaurs went. This is where the Nazis are hiding, and this is the launching point for the alien invasion (which may or may not be done with the help of dinosaur riding Nazis). For evidence that the earth is hollow, one only has to do a quick internet search. Consider this search compared to this one. There is just so much more written about Hollow Earth compared to Plate Tectonics. A Google search turns up 185,000 matches for Hollow Earth and only 82,000 for Plate Tectonics. The Hoax Buster has busted another scientific hoax!
As far as the Hoax Buster can tell, The Piltdown Man is still a hoax. I'll keep you updated on any futher developments.
Hoax Buster is currently investigating compassionate conservatism and the lunar landing. Remember, if you want to become a Hoax Buster Junior Associate, send me an email.
If you have a suspicion something isn't quite right, that there is a lie and a fraud on the loose, who are you going to call? Hoax Buster!
Return to Twisted Concepts
Copyright 2000 All rights reserved. Author of item holds all