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One night a man had a dream.
He dreamed he was walking along
the beach with the Lord.
Across the dark sky flashed scenes from his life.
For each scene, he noticed
two sets of footprints in the sand,
one belonging to him and the other to the Lord.
When the last scene of his life flashed before him,
he looked back at the footprints in the sand.
He noticed that many times along the path of his life
there was only one set of footprints.
He also noticed that it happened at the
very lowest and saddest times in his life.
This bothered him and he questioned the Lord about it.
"Lord, you said that once I decided to follow you,
you'd walk with me all the way.
But I have noticed that during the most
troublesome times in my life there is
only one set of footprints.
I don't understand why, when I needed you most
you would leave me."
The Lord replied "Yo, Dude,
I love you and stuff, and we're buds forever,
but during your times of trial and suffering,
when you see only one set of footprints in the sand,
it was then that I had to take time away from you.
At those low points in your life,
you became such a drag to be around.
With all your bitching and moaning,
All your, why me, Lord, why me
I decided you needed time to yourself.
But as you see, I've always come back.
I was still walking with you, just way over there.
And look there, at your bachelor party, all those extra footprints.
Sometimes I even brought the Apostles, especially at kick-ass
fests like the Fourth of July barbeque."
After that night, the man decided he shouldn't sniff glue
and watch the 700 Club.
 

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Copyright 2000 Sean D. Francis All Rights Reserved.
Ghastly Humour is not intended for children under 18 years of age.